Summer Trends

This season has two of the most difficult looks to pull off all rolled into one season.  Yes, the designers and big box stores would like you to believe that making these looks are as simple as shopping in their stores.  Unfortunately, this is just not the case.

Floral Trends

Some love this oldie but goodie trend, and then their are those who just don't find this look as chic as it is claimed to be.  I will let you decide on whether this look is appropriate for you, but if keep these details in mind the next time you are considering buying a floral print to add to your wardrobe it might help you pull this off.  There are a few factors that play a big roll in how floral works on you.  First, the size of the print.  Remember that the size of the floral print must match your body size.  The smaller your frame the smaller the print and moves up as your frame moves up.  If you have floral prints in your closet from 20lbs and 5 years ago, it may be time to update this look.  The second aspect of this look is color.  Remember you skin tone when purchasing any new pieces.  Just because neon is in, doesn't mean that neon pink is a look your tone can pull off.

Monochromatic Trends

Monochromatic looks this year are tough to integrate into your wardrobe because this requires keeping within one designer label.  Most people don't shop this way, so it can make this look difficult to shop for.  Keeping within one label can help you combat the color variations that can make this look chic and move it into the scary trends category.   If you do find multiple brands that keep this trend looking great, make sure you keep in mind the material and its care.  Over time, color fades and if the materials are not fading equally, after two to four wears, this look may loose its luster along with its fashionable standing.


These two trends combined with neon colors being front and center this season make finding the right look for you this season both difficult, and time consuming.  If you don't have the time to spend making sure you get this look right, keep these two options in mind.  The first being find a Stylist.  A Stylist has the expertise to make this look work for you, an this is more affordable than you might think.  Your other option is to kindly bow out of shopping these trends, and stick with updating your staples.  Regardless of the season you can always find staple pieces in nearly any store.  This could be the break you needed to update your classics.  Happy shopping!

New Beginnings; Dragging ourselves out of Ourselves

As the year winds down, we all develop and plan for our New Years resolution.  Some of us even wager against the day we will break such resolutions.  Regardless of whether you are betting for or against yourself, the end result varies on only one little detail that gets in  our way.  Ourselves.

Yes, the one person who can make all of our dreams come true, or the one person who stands in our way.  Sometimes life can be rewarding and in spite of ourselves, we actually move forward.  The path we take in life and a continuous motion forward, we cannot look to, or depend on others to get us there.

Right now I am in the middle of making plans on FY2012.  As I look to my near future, I find it disturbing to see that all the things I need and want to do are the very things I fear doing most.  These aren't complex issues, but they do require me to adjust how I operate.

It's difficult to look at ourselves.  No I don't mean in a mirror.  I mean really look at ourselves.  Exposing our flaws and calling them out as such.  I am probably one of the most self aware people around.  I am far from delusional about who I am or how I come off to others.  This being one of my flaws.

During 2012 I have a lot of changes that I must overcome.  I must change a few fundamental things about me that I have hung onto dearly for many years now.  These traits have served me well for my years in service, but now I find that they are not working in my best interest anymore.

I know that who we are cannot change overnight, and as I work on these issues a little every day, I feel the fear of the "unknown" creeping in.  Maybe fear is overstated, but certainly anxiety fits the bill.  I wonder if we can truly change the depths of who we have grown to become in a short amount of time.  I wonder if by our nature, this is recommended.

As I focus my time on being a better me for the greater good of my future, putting my anxiety to the side, I am hoping I will find the energy somewhere to fulfill all of the vast goals I have for 2012.  I do believe that my shooting for the stars should always be the goal.  This year, I have high bets on myself.  Do you?

When the Latest Fashion isn't Really Fashionable

In our society of high technology, grand science, break through medicine, cars that are truly art, and fashion that is beyond amazing, we are mesmerized by the shiny objects before us on a daily basis.  But what happens when we see fashion that isn't so fashionable.

The thought is that everything that is designed and produced in mass production is of the latest trends and most desired styles.  So how is it that end consumers get it so wrong.  Is it possible, when customers go to a store filled with the latest styles can still buy anything off the rack and walk out looking like a hot mess?  If it is, and yes, it is; the fashion industry has a lot to rethink.

Billions are spent every year from retailers, to restock the shelves and racks of the latest trends and best styles of the season.  Thousands of designs hit the racks for a single season, and consumers pull these designs off the rack to build, supplement and tailor their wardrobes.

Each day we pass any individual on the street and they are wearing a single outfit from these vary racks. They save their favorite pieces, and upgrade with the latest trends.  Some have the highest end garments to be found in their local.

Why  is it that every day on those same streets you can find a group of individuals who look as though someone instructed them on the art of the worst dressed list.  Why do some individuals, even the ones who know a great deal about fashion, still end up looking like they were dragged into a closet tornado and was tossed out into the world with something random and awkward on.

In the end, whom are really to blame?  The designers work with the latest information and the retailers select the best styles and colors for the season.  Many designers customize their own colors and prints just for their collections.  So how is it possible to end up with poor choices left on the racks for consumers?

I believe the answer is in the hands of the retailers.  Big box stores like Macy's, Dillards, and JcPenny's carry as many as one hundred and sometime more different designers each season on their floors.  These designers should have all pulled the same types of trends and colors as the others.  Each designer takes this information and processes it to fit into the theme in which their collection falls.  When combining multiple mix and match pieces by various designers, it can be nearly impossible to find like items that look as though they belong together.  This combined with sales on select items, select designers, and other promotions in stores, navigating this type of confusion calls for a professional.

Think back to the last time you went shopping in a mall.  When you actually spent time looking for items for your wardrobe, or just to update your style.  How long were you there?  Did you get frustrated?  Were you exhausted before you actually found what you were looking for?  If you were on a limited budget, were you able to find great choices without compromising style, fit or compatibility with the rest of your purchases or wardrobe? I would put money on the answers being yes.  Yes, because we all have had to make those very decisions.  We have all been frustrated that in a sea of clothing, we can't find the items that fit or work with our current selections or the rest of our wardrobe.

It is a frustration that nearly every single woman has experienced at some point in their lives.  These same individuals want help, but the help inside retail stores, isn't exactly helpful.  So what can consumers do to solve this problem?  Hire a personal shopper to shop for them?  Hire a stylist to go with them?  What if they can't afford this option.  Is style only available to those who can?  I hope not.

As our world changes for more eco friendly products, cost efficiency, maybe these very questions will be addressed by shear demand from consumers.  I know it is high time for high fashion to be available to everyone, not adapted, cut down, reduced and thrown back to the end consumer.  Possibly the very answers to waste created by the current business model can result in having major changes for the better in this industry.  For those who really need help in the style department, keep looking.  If you don't ask how much it is for a stylist in your area to assist you, you may miss out on a great opportunity.  Many up and coming stylist are looking for the opportunity to built their resume.  It can be a win-win for both parties.  Keep in mind, that striving for the most fashionable you, is going to up your game professional, and personally.

The Path We Take

I used to wonder what my life would be like if only I had made one decision that affected my life, a day later.  Or if I had taken another choice that wasn't in the mix at that moment.  Before I get to far I did say "I used to wonder".  I can safely say, I don't any longer.  I wonder if this is a result of finding our happy medium in life.  Finding our perfect wave and riding it the rest of our lives.  More about this wave later.

As we enter our teens, we are in a desperate search of who we are and we race to the finish line.  Finish high school, finish college, get that great job, find the love of our life..even if he is the first bad apple we come across.  All of this in time proves to be nothing but typical painful lessons because we refuse listen to those who have come before us.  Those with this very experience.  

Experience seems to be that key word in all of it's mystery.  Generations of children have heard from their parents and loved ones speeches and interventions trying to explain the "experience" ride.  Why is it that we can never take their advice for face value.  Why is it that we have to make the same mistakes we are warned of?  Experience.  It seems this mystery is a vicious cycle of wisdom that lands somewhere in the Bermuda Triangle of life.

I too am a victim of this insane roller coaster.  I find it eerie that I have many similarities to  my mom and her experiences in life.  I too have found the same path in the end as she did.  It seems that only some great power beyond could have possibly put us in the same realm of having such distinct similarities decades apart.  Fortunately I didn't go through a long drawn out speech, but I was given endless smoke screens as to her early years.  In the end, we took similar paths.  Could I have learned from her experience?  The answer is no.  This is why we all chose to take the hard road ahead.

Experience is only gained through the eyes of an individual.  When someone says "don't waste your money on the lotto", we can't take the advice.  We know that we may have a different result, we may have different ways of perceiving the outcome.  We may learn a different lesson.  We are convinced that we know what is best for us.  We know that the broken heart we are about to receive will be for our best interest.  We know that our bad choices are necessary for the path in life we chose to take.  

A small group of people seem to get lost in this cycle, and the rest take the path, the next path, and so on.  Each path leads us to where we are today.  Regardless of happiness, we can only accept our lives for what they are based on our choices.  In the end, our lives are our to own.  

Others may impact our lives, but it is what we choose to do that makes our worlds go round.  The experience that we gain and the memories that we build that define our happiness.  I look back on the many stupid things that I have done.  They are plenty, but I love where I am and I couldn't be here, had I not chosen the silly paths in my past.  

Today, I don't wonder "what if".  I merely question how many paths would have led to this same point.

Today, Tomorrow, but not before Yesterday

Life is the single word definition of funny.  Bringing us to laughter at the most detrimental moments throughout our breath taking days.  An uncontrollable reaction to the incidents and fleeting moments we find ourselves in daily.  Whether we find ourselves in anger, tears, or laughter, we find a way to deal with the most troublesome issues that cross our paths.  These are the tools that we have been given.  These are our keys out of this locked room.

When an event happens to us, around us, or by us, anger usually plays a role.  Recently a family member asked if I was depressed.  This is a question that angers me in and of itself, but I was listening when she made that statement and I evaluated how I really felt.  Several years ago I was diagnosed with a random condition that is and was a direct result of professionals failing to do their job.  I will refer to this as "my condition".  The details aren't important, but my anger as a result of their actions is.  So I thought long and hard about if my anger had now turned to depression.  As I explained to my family member, I am not depressed, I am angry...still.  I believe that I am entitled to this.  It is my right.  It also happens to be the one thing that keeps me going.  It fuels my drive.  Some may say that this is inappropriate, that this isn't healthy.  Fortunately for me, their opinions do not matter.  It is simple, this process works for me.  I believe it has been this way for the majority of my life.  I am driven by the limitations that other attempt to bestow on me.  My anger has built a fire in my soul that pushes me to be a better me everyday.

This seams to be especially prevalent in my career.  This is the one area that since I began working, I have heard every comment to action possible to redirect my professional goals.  I spent over a third of my life doing the one job that I loved.  Then "my condition" ended it all literally with one conversation.  One moment in time.  Hours to decide the rest of my life.  That one moment in time that changed everything.  Oddly enough, I didn't get angry immediately.  I didn't cry, I didn't laugh, I didn't do anything.  I just said okay.  I suppose at that moment, that was all I could do.

After my career ended a few months later then came the tears.  Not as a result of "my condition" but as a result of my family and where it stood at that moment.  I had fought so hard to obtain my position, it slowly eroded my home life.  I had the man I loved, yet we were separated in many ways.  All of the trials the previous two years had built up and when I returned home, it all came crashing down.  A grand total of 6 months I had experienced to many life blows and it all came upon me in a single moment.  That day was so clear to me.  I did the one thing people tell you not to do.  I made several major life changing decisions while in a heightened emotional state.  Those were the best decisions I had made in years.  Those decisions have put me where I am today.  I am thankful for that moment in time where my tears forced me to have a gut-check moment with myself.  Forcing me to evaluate my life as a whole and where I wanted to be tomorrow.

Everyday it is truly an effort for me to smile.  It physically causes me pain.  The theory it only takes one muscle to smile....well it's a lie.  Plain and simple.  Over the years dealing with "my condition" I have learn to moderate and minimize my facial features when I speak, eat, and any other movement that requires use of my face.  This means that smiling at the cashier isn't an option.  Laughing at the little jokes on TV or in a movie, becomes difficult.  playing with my child isn't always an option.  So laughing at a difficult situation, isn't the best option for me.  When I laugh, I save those moments for the truly special moments in life.  They may be few and far between, but they are cherished.

It has taken the detriments of yesterday's anger to get me to today.  It is the choices and the tears that will get me through tomorrow.  It will be my fleeting moments of laughter that make yesterday worth while.

Back to the Beginning..

As the first post, I should explain why I have embarked on this task.

Many moons ago, I used to do an immense amount of writing.  Life took over an I have forgotten the art of taking the time to express the things that cross through my mind.  In addition, my love hasn't let me forget after many many years, that he is still waiting on the ending to my TMNT story.  For those of you questioning TMNT  (Turtles is your clue).  For the 80's kids reading, shame on you if you didn't know it.  As he has pushed me to keep up this skill, I have failed miserably.  However, I am working on fixing this issue.  In addition to him keeping me on track, life had dealt me a few cards that carry a heavy toll on my ability to live my life the way I choose.  Due to this inconvenient fact, I have decided that it may do me a little bit of good to start writing again about the things that stand in my way of being me, or at least the me I want to be.

In order to protect the innocent as well as the guilty, I will not be using actual names.  The majority of this blog will be based on facts and actual events, but I will have to put a few "untruths" in here to protect a few folks.  Don't get me wrong, I am not a criminal or mob mastermind...nothing like that.  Well not today at least. :)

Please be patient with me as I fix years of learning to trash my English and destroy all of the teachings of language I had once learned.  My grammar stinks, sometimes my spelling is worse, but overall this shouldn't be painful for anyone (except my teachers)!

A bit on my background, and I will be brief.  I had an interesting childhood, and interesting career (or two), a great family life, so overall I am happy.  I am happy to know where I stand from how I grew up, the successes and failures I have experienced, and to where my future may be tomorrow.   Just in case you become confused, I love my life.  I wouldn't change where I have been, what I have done, or where I plan to go, for anything in the world.  I am who I am today, because of who I chose to be yesterday.

Now it's time to let my fingers to the talking!